December 1958 School Magazine

Decembsr, 1958

Brisbane Girls' Grammar School Maga.zine

Dec.,mber, 1958

Brisbaneo Girlr.' Grammar School Magazine

At the murder of the Governor-General's pet poodle, Bri- -tain issued an ultimatum (quote) "We have issued a n ulti- matum" (unquote) . The Nationalist movement went under- ground. After a period of about 25 years, when Britain thought Calathumpia had advanced sufficiently to be granted self- government, she said (quote) "Calathumpia may choose be- -tween complete independence and being a self governing sovereign State" (unquote ). Of course Calathumpia wanted to choose complete independence, but after a little gentle (?) persuasion from Britain, she changed her mind. However , Britain merely retained control of taxation, immigration, gov- ernment and complete administration. Following World War II, Britain finally gave Calathumpia independence and Paterthumpium was released Jrom prison, where he had been put following his private demonstrations, and became President of the new republic. But the small republic was disturbed by a movement for local autonomy by the North-North East Calathumpians (num- bering 3!) and in 1948 the United States moved in (quote) "on the side of democracy" (unquote) as the Communist front was 5,000 miles away and danger was imminent! The President of the United States issued a statement to the press: (quote) " I will not issue any statements to the press" (unquote). The U.S. later revealed that this prompt action had pre- vented a coup d'etat by Lieutenant-Colonel Ferdinand Nassop, _who had intended after assuming power to build a pre- nationalized Calathumpian Canal, for which U.S.S .R. had pro- mised to supply a consignment of prefabricated canol-locks. As a result of these disturbances, the average population was reduced, by 1957, to 6t. As there was no more work for them to do, the Govern- ment of Calathumpia resigned and retired to the Riviera with as much of the public revenue as they could carry. Pater- ihumpium was quietly assassinated, and the cry of "Cala- thumpia for the Thumps! " quickly quenched, as the remaining member of the population had not yet learned to speak. Plans have been made for putting the population under the control of U.N.I.C.E .F. The suggestion of making Calathumpia an independent State, under U.N. protection, has been vetoed by U.S .S .R. who considers (quote ) "We will not sit down in the same assembly as that political ghost" (unquote). -Roving· Reporter, IV. 5D

-Linda Lewis, !VB.

AN ABORIGINAL BORA RING The ritual Bora Ring is the depression in the ground which, over the years, has filled with water. The Ring is at Samsonvale.