1998 School Magazine

Girls Grammar ^, rho0138ri5bane 1998

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Win^unR: JITNIOR MER. ER WEAVER SPEECHS I. 997 The Quarrel of lovers is not the Renewal of love

When quarrels are not resolved, drastic measures are taken - couples break Lip, separate, divorce. The current divorce rate in Australia is between one in three and one in four. There is even a Do-it-Yourself Divorce Kit on the Internet. Are these divorces the resLilt of petty things like men leaving the dunny seat up? No. they are the result of arguments. The hard truth is that not all domestic disputes end happily. John Milton said in 1671, "Love quarrels oft in pleasing concord end. " He has obviously not seen Fatal Attraction. I'm sure that the cute little rabbit that was boiled by psycho Glenn Close would disagree that lovers' quarrels end happily There are many examples of relationships that have driven down Splitsville Street after travelling along Disagreement Drive: Sally Field and Robin Williams in Mrs Donboftre; Billy and Anne in Neighbot, Is; and Bailey and Salah in Party of Flue Here's an example that most of you are familiar with - Ross and Rachel. For weeks we watched them argue about Rachel's new job. Their constant qLiarrels did not strengthen their love - they were like little termites gradually eating away at the relationship. Finally, on Monday 8 September at seven fifty- nine, Eastern Standard Time it was with great sorrow that we witnessed their bleak-up HLiitiankind's natLiral, emotional reaction to qLiarrels does not involve passion, affection or any fomT of love. When someone criticises, insults and verbally abLises yoti, are you filled willT an immense sense of affection for that person? No Hostility and resentment const!me you. Hostility versus love There is a bit of a difference. .. in normal I'elationships, anyway Vilen lovers quarrel, love is not the predominant emotion in the 11 ITiind 11nless 111e loveis aie characters on Menuse Place, where Linbridled passion is ITever ITlore than a desktop away Quarrels do not ^enew love - they weaken and destroy it because at'gLiiiients do not always eiTd nappily and they provoke animosity lietween lovers. TITe next time yoti are tempted to figlit with you 110ver, reineinber I!/t!is uel:ysbo!taild theIP is 110 time 101 Illssi'jig alldlight^71g lily 1'1'errds. it that doesn't convince all yoLi 111en out there, spai'e a thought for John Bobbit. I thinl< we should I\ave a 11TolllGrit's silence for poor Johnny who woke Lip one nToi'ITing after an atgLiment will\ ITis wife to find that a prominent part of 1115 anatomy was 111is sing

Franks Blanche Franks Blanches

Hi Blanche, I'm home it's eleven o'clock, Frank. Where have you been? At the office I called your Qince. There was no answer. Do you think I don't know what's going on? All the late nights, lipstick on your collar, that happy expres- sion on your face. You're having an affair, aren't you? Don't be ridiculous! It's that bimbo secretary of yours, isn't it? Veronica or Victoria or something Her name's Virginia Virginia. 1'11 bet that name's a little inappropriate

Frank Blanche:

Franks Blanche:

Having overheard this argument, you walk into the room where Frank and Blanche are sitting. What do you expect 10 see? a) The couple in a blissful embrace, exchanging affectionate glances b) Frank and Blanche inflicting grievous bodily harm upon one another and searching the yellow pages for the nearest divorce court Well, apparently the correct answer is a). T'hat is, if we are foolish and naive enough to believe the proverb, "the qLiarrel of lovers is the renewal of love". This ploverb must have originated in such a perfect world. .. a niagicat land where divorces are like renewing wedding vows and when people say, "we can still be friends" they actually mean it The entire concept is ridiculous. Quarrels do not renew love because fights between lovers are not always ^esolved and the natural 11uman response to an argument does not involve love Apologies o1' exchanges of forgiveness attel' atgLiments renew love. However, they are not included in tile ai'gument itself, they are completely separate. The definition of a quarrel is an angiy dispute or disagreement ITiarked by a bi'eak in friendly relations - there is no ITTenrion of making Lip. Therefore, one cannot say tliat quailels renew love because it is the resolution after' the quarrel that achieves this end, not the ai. gument itself

by innY unlNSWORTH

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